I will recap the reunion weekend soon but I have something else rolling around in my brain and I need to sort it out. The reunion was fun and the trip home was fast. I am exhausted.
What has been rolling around in my brain…what I cannot stop thinking about is Loud Girl laughing and clapping and cheering with Manager about the “good news” they can celebrate in addition to her new job. Bob has said that it is possible they were talking about something else. While it is possible, I think it is highly improbable. The timing was all too convenient. I got the call from my new boss offering me the job. Then she wanted to talk to Manager and work out the details about how much notice I need and my end date here before starting at New Department. Once Manager hung up the phone, she talked to Loud Girl in hushed tones and then Loud Girl began her crowing and celebrating. I have to say that it hurt then and it hurts now. It hurts because this means Manager has been confiding in Loud Girl about me and apparently her confidences haven’t been favorable. It hurts because Manager was supposed to be a safe person for me. It hurts because Loud Girl has never been a safe person for me and in fact has felt more like an enemy. It hurts because I didn’t want to be “that person”. You know, that person that brings calamity and pain to their work environment. That person that causes eye rolls and sighs of impatience and frustration from her co-workers. Apparently I am that person to Loud Girl and Manager and who knows who else. It just hurts. And it hurts because my boss has befriended and confided in the one person who hates me about the things she dislikes about me. This gives Loud Girl more fodder to hate in me. I am considering talking to an HR representative about this. It doesn’t seem right that my boss should get to confide in anyone not her superior about me. For sure I will be discussing it with my counselor today.