Monday, September 17, 2007

Major Communication

We had a busy weekend, exacerbated by my incredible mood swings.  Seems the Clomid is working.  Last time you wouldn’t have known I was on it other than I tended to be a tad weepier.  This time, woo boy!  Poor Bob.  Thankfully there is only one more day of Clomid this cycle.

Friday night I reorganized the room we use as our office.  I got a 6 ft. table on sale at Big L0ts and some plastic drawer thingys.  Then I went to B3d B@th and B3yond and got some bed lifts. (These things you put under the feet of your bed to add height to your bed and storage space.)  Then I went home and disconnected everything electrical and moved it all from our old crappy desk.  Then I hauled the old, crappy desk to the dumpster and set the table up on top of the bed lifts.  Once that was done, I put all our electronics on the table and hooked everything back up.  So far Bob is really happy with the arrangement. He can now get all the way up to the desk and his wheelchair armrests fit under the table/desk now.  It really saves his back and neck and arms from stretching and straining.

Saturday was all about homework.  There was a glitch in that I could not get logged in to the library database and that caused no small amount of angst and frustration.  I got done what I could get done and that was that.  I am just so anxiety-ridden about this class and the group project we are working on.  I ended up getting into a really good group and don’t want to wreck it by being the flake or the person who can’t get work done because of technical issues.  I don’t want to be “that person”.

Once the homework stuff was done, I decided to clean up our balconies.  Our north facing balcony needed to be winterized.  I put away the grill and the gas tank.  I moved the bistro table from one end to the other.  I also cleaned out the dead impatiens from our window box and refilled the bird seed.  The west facing balcony had some dead and some living flowers.  So I cleaned out the dead flowers (petunias, dianthus, alyssum, sunflowers, and vincas) and put the puts away.  Then I watered and weeded the morning glories and geraniums.  Thankfully the frost/freeze we had Friday night did not adversely affect them.  There are blooms bursting all over.

Sunday was laundry and more homework.  Tuesday I meet with my group to go over what we have so far.  I think this class is just going to be a huge pain in the butt and I can’t wait until it’s over.

Bob and I had a good talk on Saturday.  We talked about how we’ve both been feeling overwhelmed and kind of down.  For him, he’s depressed about losing strength, dealing with daily pain, not having a job or work to do, and not having friends nearby.  His depression makes him want to curl up in a ball and do nothing.  So, he does nothing.  He’s kind of the “all or nothing” kind of guy so if one thing seems to be going badly, it ALL needs to be flushed down the crapper.  I’ve noticed this but there’s nothing I can do to change it so I’ve been going out of my way to try and make it all better which leads to me feeling overwhelmed, underappreciated, overtired, and not a very happy camper.  We got it all out on the table and are both making changes to try and help the other and still work through our crap ourselves.  The big change we are making is to get to church next week.  We are going to visit a myriad of local houses of worship to see where we best fit.  We hope that goes a long way to help us feel connected to God and others.  It was a good talk and it certainly cleared a lot of things up.  Good thing I’m a Communications major, huh?

1 comment:

Amy said...

Wow, you got A LOT done! I always have grandiose expectations for those big jobs. Sometimes, I even go so far as to put 'em on paper. But that's about it. I'm impressed that you did that all by yourself.

I hope you find a good church. We've struggled in that area since leaving our old church just over a year ago. It's hard to find a new one to fit into, but we honestly haven't really been trying very hard.

Good luck with Clomid, I hope it works for you!