It’s been a while, huh? I am so excited for Memorial Weekend. Three full days of nothing. Nothing planned. Nothing anticipated. No requirements. No responsibilities. No work and no school. I. Can’t. Wait. Life has been too full and too busy these past couple of months and I am so happy to have three days of nothing.
Work has been getting me down lately. I’ve been here three years and things have changed so much in those three years, and not so much for the better. The latest issue is frustrating for many. I’ve been seeing a counselor over my lunch hour about every other week. Last week my boss’s boss noticed I was in early and asked my boss why. She did not know so she asked me. I said I came in a half hour early because I had a lunch appointment and wanted to make up the time. She said that I should let her know next time. Fine. I went to counseling and was back in time only to find a note on my desk asking me to meet my boss in her cube. She wanted to know what was going on and what kind of appointment I had. I told her it was personal and I did not want to divulge that information but it would be a standing appointment either every week or every other week. She said that was not possible because per her boss, we could only make lunch appointments once per quarter without it affecting our PTO. That equals to roughly once a month and I don’t think I can do once a month counseling right now. I need it too much to put three weeks between appointments.
Like a doofus, I started to cry. I hate crying at work. However, after counseling, I was about halfway there and hearing these things from my boss pushed me over the edge. To her credit she just expressed concern and asked how she could help, but stated again that she had to know what kind of appointments were important enough for all of this. So I told her that I was seeing a counselor and I needed to go once a week or once every other week. She said she would talk to her boss and see if she could get it approved. She ended up getting it approved, but made it known that they are already making an exception for me for my school. I come in early on Monday and take a half hour lunch and leave early in order to get to school on time. In all of this, I always give my employer 40 full hours of work. I don’t shortchange them and I don’t ask them to pay me for time I haven’t put in. My frustration comes in that I am an adult. I frustrated with my boss and her boss policing my time. As long as I come in early, stay late, or shorten my lunch and they are getting the full 40 I was hired to provide, I don’t understand why there is an issue. This is not the only frustrating thing about work right now, but it’s the one that’s in the forefront.
I was watching Dateline NBC on Sunday and they were interviewing Oprah. She said something that resonated with me. She said she knew she had to buy her own show and be her own boss because she never wanted to be in a position where her heart was calling her to something her bosses could put the kibosh on. I wish I knew what I could do on my own so that I could answer my own heart’s cry.